It’s not the end of the world as we know it (and I still feel like crap…)

I guess I have to throw in my 2 (euro) cents about this whole CERN LHC thingy (if you know not of what I speak click here. And buy a newspaper/radio/TV).

Well, the world didn’t end, which was nice. Of course, the pedants among you will know that actually today was just the machine being turned on - the potentially universe-eating moment comes when they get 2 particles to crash into each other and, like, this whole mess of crap comes out (to quote Friends, of all things).

But it was nice to hear on the Radio 2 news this morning that the world was probably not going to end today (this is perhaps something that should be said more often).

The 1 minute story basically ran with the facts:

1. World’s largest science experiment starting today

2. To uncover the secrets of the Universe

3. Took years to build

4. Cost lots of money

They really should have stopped there quite frankly. But they added:

5. Might kill us all

6. Probably won’t

Unless you had already heard about the extreeeemely small potential for black holes they really shouldn’t have mentioned it. There’s nothing like being told that everything will almost certainly be okay to scare the bejesus out of people. They even had an expert to reassure us that the experiments would not destroy the Earth, as more volatile particles hit the planet every day. Who was this expert? Well, apparently it was Stephen Hawking, but quite frankly it could have just been Terry Wogan with a voicebox.

(okay, that was a cheap shot and I’m sorry)

However, I was wondering though if anyone took the whole thing to heart and started preparing for The End. You know the sort of thing - telling people they shouldn’t that they love them; committing crimes for a laugh; selling all their stuff and spending the money on that Amazing Spiderman issue 1 they always wanted, and then burning it.

For the record: I have always loved you, I would never do anything illegal, and I have nothing worth selling.

So if any of you did anything like this (or even considered it) why not leave me a comment below so we can all laugh at you. Hey, what does it matter if we do - the world might end tomorrow…


5 Responses to “It’s not the end of the world as we know it (and I still feel like crap…)”

  1. Dolf Says:

    On the other hand, as someone pointed out in The Times, “the world will probably not come to an end” might be what scientists said just before the Big Bang…

  2. Heather Says:

    Apparently there was more chance of evaporating while shaving than being obliterated by an LHC-produced black hole. Or something.

  3. Penny Says:

    But still more chance than winning the euromillions. The Register said it, so it must be true.

  4. Neville the part-time barman Says:

    That would suggest that at least one person per week (not counting rollovers) gets big-banged by a massive science experiment and several people get medium-banged, with lots getting small-banged. Or something.

  5. Penny Says:

    only if they buy a ticket!

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