Specky specky four-eyes

After years of being not quite able to see properly, I finally got glasses a couple of weeks ago. I had glasses when I was 7 to correct something or other, but not since then. For the past 20 years my eyesight was never that bad; good enough to drive if I was able to do such a thing (I failed my test 3 times, more on that later…) However, by the end of a day of staring at a computer screen I’d often be feeling a bit blurry so I decided to take the plunge and get some specs.

It’s a weird feeling wearing¬† them. The first time I put them on in the opticians I thought “Ah, so that’s what things are meant to look like.” The best way I can describe it, well the geekiest way I can describe it anyway, is that it’s like raising the resolution in a video game. Although I could see enough previously well enough to play the game, everything has slightly more detail now. For example, there’s a clock on the far wall at work that I could see from desk was a clock, but I couldn’t make out the hands or numbers. However, glasses on and not only can I read the numbers but it even tells me what time it is. Genius!

I was also strangely nervous when I first put them on at work. It was like one of those times when you were a kid when you went into school with a new haircut and you knew everyone was going to stare and comment. Actually, going to school with a new pair of glasses seems like a much better comparison (although I guess some of you didn’t have glasses when you were young, while I can only hope you all had hair…)

Anyway, luckily for me it turns out that my colleagues aren’t 9 years old and no-one pointed and laughed. At least, not in front of my face. Oh, now I’m all paranoid.

The problems is that I now wear them at work all day and this means that when I’m not wearing them I really notice how bad my eyesight is. I’m going to see Radiohead tomorrow night (more on that later…) and can’t decide whether or not to take my specs with me. On the one hand, it would be a nightmare if they got broken due to some crazy No Surprises induced moshing, but on the other, Tom Yorke is only about 9 inches tall and it will be hard enough to see him with them on. From the front row.

My final part to this spectacle spectacular is a tale of woe from this very day. I was just getting into work, waiting in the lobby for a lift, and I saw a woman walking towards me who looked entirely like one of my colleagues. Being a friendly sort, or at least wanting to appear so, I watched her as she walked in and smiled in her direction. As she got closer (now looking at me as well) I realised it wasn’t my colleague at all but someone who I’d never seen before,¬† giving me a look as if I was some sort of freak. Under the circumstances this was probably fair enough. I quickly hurried into the lift that had thankfully just arrived…

To make matters worse, 10 minutes later I got introduced to a new colleague who was joining us from today. Guess who? Ace. She said hello and gave me the kind of smile that only uses the mouth, while the eyes are saying “oh, it’s YOU is it.”

Maybe I’ll get contacts…

One Response to “Specky specky four-eyes”

  1. jimmythejam Says:

    Wear the glasses! They very rarely fall off at gigs, the only time they did for me was at a Black Grape gig, and I was in a particularly sorry state for that one and jumping about A LOT in the moshpit… Afterwards I waited for the rest of the crowd to leave and managed to find them, only slightly trampled, right in front of the stage..

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